Thursday, December 30, 2010
This is my ode to all those assholes out there, yeah, you all know who you are. To those people we all have in our lives that would much rather use us for when everything fit their schedule; rather than, be good friends to us. All I know is, after these 4-5 months of living outside my families walls and being around very few people than I was before I can tell you with very strong conviction I think people are absolute bullshit. They do nothing but bring one another down, hurt eachother, and then they smile and pretend to be a good person. Fuck that! I cannot stand those who live by a do as I say not as I do mentality. I fully dislike so many people I once confused for friends....they all just suck.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
There is no worse feeling than the feeling of not being good enough. We've all been there, that moment in time where your heart hits your stomach and you feel as though life is anything but fair. Better yet, we've all asked ourselves the infamous question of "why me"? Today I was confronted with the bitter feeling of not being quite good enough, not that it has never happened prior to this; however, this time I felt the impact severely. Automatically you reach for anger, you belittle the person or whatever made you feel the way you do, but when it comes down to it, things happen as they should. That's life, you get kicked when you're down and sometimes the ones we desperately want just don't feel the same. After all the excuses you give for the way someone behaves and all the times you find yourself waiting because you THINK it may change in time, you can't. At the end of the day the people who want to be in our lives prove that. They are there and will always be, while the one that aren't have made that choice apparent by their absence. A feeling is only a feeling till you let it get the best of you. This feeling has got a hold on me, and I can't get out.